I will never forget the surreal feeling the night Olivia died. It was like I was watching everything take place as I floated above my body. It had to be some other family going through this. It couldn't possibly be real. I've had that same surreal feeling many times over the last 4 years. It … Continue reading Surreal
childhood cancer research
Three
I have three kids. But only two of them are here with me. Nearly two and a half years ago my precious daughter went to Heaven at just 20 months old after a long battle with brain cancer. Her loss has left behind a never-ending trail of grief and difficult questions. We are often asked … Continue reading Three
She’s Missing
It's here. February. The month of my twins birth. I always expect their birthday to be a difficult day, but this year my grief has taken hold even earlier than I expected. And it seems to be that way for my little boy, Wyatt, too. We try to talk about Olivia daily. We look at … Continue reading She’s Missing
Why You Should Give 4
Our daughter only got one birthday on earth. Her first. We celebrated with a big party with family and friends at the local train depot. It was a celebration of not only Olivia and her twin brother Wyatt's first birthday, but also of Olivia's remission from brain cancer. Oh little did we know on that … Continue reading Why You Should Give 4
Running Out Of Time
I will never forget the day we found out Olivia was terminal. We knew she wasn't doing well but it was still a huge shock. When we stepped out of the hospital that day my husband and I resolved to make the most of the time we had left with our princess. From that moment … Continue reading Running Out Of Time
Joy
Have you ever just stopped at a moment in your life and felt such an indescribable feeling of joy? This was one of those moments for me. Playing at the park on our first real family vacation with our twins. Olivia was thought to be cancer free and healthy. We pushed the kids on the … Continue reading Joy
How to Love a Grieving Parent
Any parent who has lost a child spends the rest of their life in mourning. They are forever broken. Sad. No longer whole. If you have faith in God you can find some comfort in the fact that your little angel is in the arms of Jesus and they are spared the hurts of this … Continue reading How to Love a Grieving Parent
Fear
Nearly two and a half years ago my worst fear came true. My daughter died in my arms after a long battle with cancer. The fear of losing a child was something that rattled me even before I first became pregnant. That fear became magnified after I lost our first baby to an ectopic pregnancy … Continue reading Fear
I Can’t Think Of You
The day I found out I was having a boy and a girl (twins) was truly the best day of my life. I had always hoped to have a little girl. A precious little lady that I could love and cherish and help mold into a wonderful woman some day. Olivia was everything I had hoped … Continue reading I Can’t Think Of You
Was She Real?
Our Olivia has been in Heaven now for 2 years and 2 months. That's an entire 6 months longer than she was alive. I find myself questioning sometimes whether or not she was even real or just a figment of my imagination. Our life today is vastly different from the life we shared with our … Continue reading Was She Real?