The common consensus seems to be that 2016 was a tough year. There were serious hardships. Down economies. Trials. And a lot of grief. This sentiment rings true for our family too. 2016 was a tough one. As 2017 kicks off I am ready to leave the past year behind. While 2016 brought forth a … Continue reading Here’s To 2017
pediatric cancer research
Post Holiday Blues
The day after Christmas I woke up with a familiar ache. My heart longed for my little girl and I spent the whole day in a funk. Nothing and no one made me happy. All I wanted to do was hide under my covers and cry. This is the reality of child loss. Sometimes the … Continue reading Post Holiday Blues
Split Second
There have been a lot of tragedies lately. Families have lost loved ones, received horrible diagnoses and so much more. It has been heartbreaking to watch and has brought up so many memories. Just a few weeks ago a young woman who I went to high school with was killed by a drunk driver. She … Continue reading Split Second
20 Months and 3 Days
Our family reached another milestone last week. Our littlest, Landon, turned 20 months old. In other words, he reached the age that would be our Olivia's last. Olivia lived for exactly 20 months and 3 days on this earth before she passed away on 10/22/13 from brain cancer. As of today, Landon is 20 months … Continue reading 20 Months and 3 Days
Seas of Change
We recently got back from a week long vacation in San Diego. We had a beautiful time playing on the beach, visiting Sea World, and checking out the tide pools. It was so different from our last visit. We went to San Diego 2.5 years ago about a month after Olivia passed away. It was a … Continue reading Seas of Change
Thank You
Sometimes the Timehops from Facebook are enough to make me want to break down. This past week that was definitely true. For three or four days I woke up each morning to a reminder that 3 years ago on June 6, 2013 we found out that Olivia's cancer had returned. For those agonizing days I … Continue reading Thank You
The Grieving Mother
I've been thinking a lot about grief the last few days. Mother's Day always brings up a lot of emotions for me. It's truly bittersweet. It's a day that's equally filled with joy and sadness, because while I am still a mother to two wonderful little boys, I am also still the grieving mother of a … Continue reading The Grieving Mother
A Choice
Watching cancer take my daughter's life was the most painful thing I've ever experienced. It was something I thought I would never survive. She was the greatest gift I've ever been given that had to be taken away. The day Olivia died my heart was crushed, but I also made a choice. I chose in that moment … Continue reading A Choice
Way Back Then
I've spent a lot of time lately looking back on the past years and sitting back in awe of all that's transpired. On that day in July 2009, my husband and I got married. We had every hope in the world for this new journey we were beginning together. We imagined a life together in … Continue reading Way Back Then
Guilt
Guilt is a constant companion after you lose a child. You feel guilty when you are depressed because you worry that you are neglecting the rest of your family. You also feel guilty when you are doing well because you worry that you are forgetting about the child you lost. The morning after Olivia died … Continue reading Guilt