Before I even knew Olivia was going to die I had a deep desire for another baby. My pregnancy with the twins and their first months of life had been really tough. I longed for another opportunity to carry a baby, hoping with all I had for a better experience. When Livy died from brain … Continue reading The Rainbow
child loss
She Was
To say that child loss is life-changing is such an understatement. Losing a child doesn't just break your heart and change your life. It causes a truly cosmic shift in the makeup of your soul. I sat down to write a post today about the heartbreak that comes each time I have to refer to … Continue reading She Was
A New Kind Of Perfect
For so many years I lived a kind of double life. On the outside it looked like I had it all together. Yes, I had lost my only daughter to cancer. But I was "thriving." I ran a successful nonprofit that grew more each day. I had the perfect marriage. I simply wasn't going to … Continue reading A New Kind Of Perfect
A Punch In The Gut
Today started like any other. I woke up to the embrace of my sweet 3 year old who likes to start the morning by petting my hair. We woke up, I had coffee, fed my boys breakfast and hit the day with a running start. I was blissfully unaware that today was any different from … Continue reading A Punch In The Gut
Glitter, Gold & Butterflies
I am sitting in my office today completely overcome with gratitude. Each minute more donations are pouring in for our 1st Annual Butterfly Ball. People who never met my precious girl are spending money on tickets to attend the Ball in honor of what would have been her 6th birthday on February 19th. And many … Continue reading Glitter, Gold & Butterflies
New Year & New Beginnings
Another new year has begun and I can't help but be struck by how different the beginning of this new year is compared to the last. On January 4, 2017 I made the most difficult decision of my life when I chose to officially end my nearly 8 year long marriage to my high school … Continue reading New Year & New Beginnings
Piece By Piece
The day I lost my only daughter, Olivia, to brain cancer my heart shattered. Something deep inside of me broke. And ever since that awful moment on October 22, 2013 I have been living as an incomplete person. She was part of me and living without her now just doesn't feel right. For 4 years … Continue reading Piece By Piece
Embracing The New
2017 is quickly coming to an end and it has me reflecting on how much life has changed this year. This has been a year of transitions and new beginnings. Some of those transitions have been horribly painful while others have been truly great. 2017 was the year my marriage officially ended after separating near … Continue reading Embracing The New
She Saw Jesus
People ask me often how I can cling to my faith the way I do after losing my only daughter to brain cancer before she even made it to her 2nd birthday. And the answer to that question always takes me back to the night Olivia died. Watching a loved one, especially your child, die … Continue reading She Saw Jesus
How Could I Say Goodbye?
Today I woke up with a sick feeling in my stomach. It has been this way each morning for at least a week. I have known what's coming and I am anything but prepared. This week is packed full off anniversaries. Each one even worse than the one before it. And my heart just isn't … Continue reading How Could I Say Goodbye?
Beauty From The Ashes 