Today I woke up with a sick feeling in my stomach. It has been this way each morning for at least a week. I have known what's coming and I am anything but prepared. This week is packed full off anniversaries. Each one even worse than the one before it. And my heart just isn't … Continue reading How Could I Say Goodbye?
pediatric cancer
Last Snow
The first snow storm of the season blanketed Casper earlier this week. As I watched the snow fall, silently covering the city in white, my mind took me back in time to the first Casper snow four years ago. Ironically, just as I am this week, I was fighting my first cold of the season … Continue reading Last Snow
I give you my word
Guest Blog Written By: Mark Caldwell (Olivia's Paternal Grandfather) A little over four years ago a friend of mine whom I worked with at a country club in Reno said these words to me. Eric Dye was a former Marine who had seen duty overseas in Iraq and was home following his dream of becoming a … Continue reading I give you my word
To My Broken Hearted Boy
I write often about the struggles that come with being a grieving mother. The loss of my daughter can be all consuming. Especially this time of year as we rapidly approach the anniversary of Olivia's death. But what I don't talk about very often is the incredible toll the loss of Olivia has taken on … Continue reading To My Broken Hearted Boy
This Is Why Pediatric Cancer Matters
Before my only daughter was diagnosed with brain cancer at 4 months old I couldn't have cared less about pediatric cancer. Sure, it was sad. But it was rare. I didn't know anyone personally who had dealt with pediatric cancer in their family so I had no reason to get behind the cause. My daughter, … Continue reading This Is Why Pediatric Cancer Matters
He Became An Ironman For Olivia
Yesterday was one of the best days of my entire life. I had the absolute honor of watching a man I had never met in person compete in the Coeur d'Alene Ironman Triathlon. And he did the whole thing to remember my daughter, Olivia, and raise money for pediatric cancer research. Eric Dye worked with … Continue reading He Became An Ironman For Olivia
Fear
Fear. It's something we all struggle with to some extent every day. The fear of the unknown. Fear of lingering tragedy. Fear of disappointment. Even fear of reality. My heart has been so heavy these past few days. So many of my nearest and dearest are struggling mightily with really big things. Some are struggling … Continue reading Fear
Who I Am
I turned 30 in June and to celebrate this big birthday I went on my first ever girls trip with three of my closest friends. We spent three full days experiencing just a small portion of what Napa and San Francisco had to offer. That time was so wonderful. For the first time maybe ever … Continue reading Who I Am
He Saved Me
People ask me all the time how I've been able to survive the loss of my only daughter. While my faith in God is a huge part of my survival and peace, I am also certain that the biggest reason I am still standing is that God had also given me Olivia's twin brother, Wyatt. … Continue reading He Saved Me
Even If
The past 6 years have been a rollercoaster that has completely changed who I am as a person. What began as a rather shaky faith in God has morphed into a full belief that has shaped my very being. I wish I could say that faith came easily. But it has been through trial and … Continue reading Even If